August 28, 2018

Advice from a Wedding Planner

Posted in: For Brides

I have worked with many wedding planners over the last seven years and Rebecca is by far one of the best!  She is the reason I booked my first wedding in Selma shortly after moving here and she has made my job so much easier at countless weddings since then.  Rebecca and her husband, Jeffrey, own Shabby & Chic Events and they work together to give you an amazing wedding experience.  They offer planning services as well as florals and floral design, lighting, and prop rentals.  The wedding photos that are featured here were from the snow wedding we did together last December where it snowed in Alabama for Dee and Michael’s wedding!

Check out Rebecca’s top advice from a wedding planner in this countdown!

5. Do not draw a line in the sand

In a perfect world, there would be no step parents or crazy uncles.  Unfortunately, that’s not the case and a wedding will bring all these personalities together.  You want to navigate these situations with as much grace and understanding as you can.  I have been in meetings with brides discussing wedding party flowers and I will always ask if there are step parents/grandparents.  At this point, I will sometimes get rolling of the eyes and deep sighs.  My advice is always the same, “Your wedding is not the place to draw a line in the sand.”  Do not damage (or further damage) a relationship over something so trivial as to where someone sits and if they get a flower or not.  You never know how your gesture of inclusion may change someone’s heart!

4. Communicate, Communicate, Communicate

You’ve been dreaming of this day for years.  You have this idea in your head as to what you want for your wedding day.   You need to communicate it well to your vendors and more importantly, have them communicate it back to you.  Making sure you are on the same page is important.  If it is hard for you to articulate exactly what you are wanting, you need to be prepared with pictures that reflect your style.  Keep an open dialogue with your vendors throughout the planning process to ensure no one has gotten off track.  If you have a sense that a vendor is not “getting it,” speak up!   If you do not say anything to get them back on board with your vision, they will continue down their path without knowing anything is amiss.  

3. Have a budget and tell your vendors what it is!

We have all seen Say Yes to the Dress on TLC.  Every once in a while, Randy will have to implore a bride to avoid dresses that are not in her budget.  Typically, when she goes against his advice, it does not end well.  There’s crying, wailing, and gnashing of teeth.  Vendors ask for your budget because they need to know the financial parameters.  For instance, along with planning, I am an event florist.  I ask brides for a budget first because I do not want to suggest large floral installations or exotic flowers if it is not in the budget.  The last thing I want to do is disappoint a bride!   Most reputable vendors feel the same way.  They share your goal – a dream wedding.  A happy bride sends referrals!

2. Be nice!

I realize the world has told you this day is all about you, but it’s not.  It’s about your fiancé, your family, and your friends.  It’s about the two of you becoming one.  Your mom will get on your last nerve.  Be nice.  The steamer will stop working.  Be nice.  One of the groomsmen will be late.  Be nice.  Inevitably, something will go wrong.  Be nice.  Don’t get distracted by the annoyances that may creep up during the day.  Keep your eyes on the prize.  He’ll be waiting for you at the end of the aisle.  It’s important.  Don’t forget to be nice!

1. Plan more for your marriage than you do for your wedding

According to The Knot, the average bride is engaged for 14.5 months.  Knowing brides like I do, they start planning and thinking about their wedding LONG before getting the ring.  Brides want to have their wedding day be the most perfect day of their life and I can understand that.  One thing I hear A LOT from brides after the wedding and honeymoon are over, is that they’re sad.  There is no more planning, no more parties, no more being the center of attention.  It’s over.  Just like that.  Real world starts with the day in and day out of life.  It’s in this time, if you have planned for your marriage, you can embrace your new role as a partner.  However, if you have not planned well for marriage, you can become disillusioned and depressed.  My husband and I went through a program before we were married and it was life changing for us.  Our motto is “Die to Live.”  You die daily to your needs and wants to meet the needs and wants of your spouse.  It’s not always easy, but it’s been a relationship saver more times than we can count.  Something else that is super important: pray together.  Start right now!  You will face many challenges as a married couple and prayer will get you through every single one!

 

Be sure to check out more of Rebecca and Jeffrey’s work on Facebook and Instagram!

Which piece of advice was the most eye-opening for you?  Tell us in the comments!

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